4 Questions from The Man Hunt…

So if you read my post on Wednesday about The Man Hunt. You know that I attended a singles event last weekend and you also know that I participated in a panel discussion, called “The 3 stools”.

The 3 stools started with three women being selected from the crowd, one in her 20’s, I was forced selected to represent for the 30s and another in her 40’s. The guest expert Charmaine led the Q&A starting with the by questioning the women, allowing the crowd to comment as well. A short intermission followed and the stools were swapped out for 3 men and another discussion ensued.

Sadly because I waited nearly a week to write this post I’ve already forgotten some of what was discussed, but I did leave with some questions that I like to pose to you.

1. What is your biggest dating challenge?

This was the first question that the women were asked. I replied that my biggest challenge was meeting guys that were serious about meeting somebody and having a relationship. Of course the guys in the audience disagreed and had all kinds of counterarguments.

What is your biggest obstacle in dating? Have you determined a way to overcome it?

2. Is it okay to go Dutch?

I believe this was the first question asked of the men. Actually, I think the initial question had to do with being 50/50 in relationships, but this was a spinoff of that question. I was amazed at how many men that this was totally acceptable to go dutch on the first date. In the mens defense several men said that they should step up and pay for at least the first date.

How do you feel about going dutch? Should the man always pay for the first date?

Ladies do you offer to pay for dates?

Men, how you feel about the lady picking up the tab?

3. Is chivalry dead?

I forgot how it came up, but this one (not surprisingly) sparked quite a debate. We women shared our stories of the doors that have hit us in the face, elevator doors that have slammed shut, being walked off the sidewalk, etc… An all the guys swore they were perfect gentlemen (ok so that may be an exaggeration, but not by much).

Ladies, is chivalry dead? maybe on life support? Do you feel chivalry is necessary? or is it outdated?

Men, are you chivalrous? Do you open doors? hold elevators? walk on the outside?

4. How should ladies respond to chivalry?

This was asked in response to previous question. A man in the crowd stated that he always opens doors for ladies, but that they are not always appreciative. He asked the panel (including me) how did we express our gratitude for demonstrated chivalry. My answer was “I say thank you and flash a smile”. He didn’t think that was good enough, being there to participate and learn I asked him, what I should do? or what would you like? He suggested that I take it a step further and ask the gentleman his name and introduce myself. This seemed like overkill to me, but I did say the next time a stranger opened the door for me I would indeed introduce myself and ask his name and possibly strike up a conversation. The Man Hunt was last Friday, its Friday again…I’ve not had the opportunity to test his suggestion. *insert sideeye*

Men, what kind of gratitude do you expect for simple acts of chivalry?

Ladies, how do you express your gratitude when you encounter a gentlemen?

Well I’ve asked several questions and I hope you take the time to share your thoughts. Inquiring minds want to know 🙂


One comment on “4 Questions from The Man Hunt…

  1. Can’t say that I have a complete problem with going dutch on the first date, I typically don’t but I have in the past and neither of us blinked an eye at it. It’s more exception than rule.

    RE: Chivalry…I don’t think it’s dead or on life support. Amazingly I’ve gone out with women that didn’t think having doors opened was a big deal; conversely, I’ve gone out with women that thought that because I did it I had obviously descended from royalty. It, and actions like it, are just the right thing to do, I don’t expect a reward for doing the right thing…it’s just the right thing. Question is do men not do it because they aren’t taught to or because of lowered standards, they aren’t expected to? Wrote a blog on that about a month ago, come check it. 🙂

    Sorry so long, I got on a roll.


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